No, You Don’t Have to Force December

I get the desire for cheer in December. I really do.

The winter solstice gives us the shortest day of the year. The world tilts and shrinks the light. Things go gray. Cold sets in. It’s only natural we’d want to fight that back—with lights, with laughter, with plans, with cheer.
We’re not wrong to want it. But that doesn’t mean we’re all up for it.

Because for some people, the season doesn’t bring joy. It brings pressure. Pressure to smile, to show up, to spend, to perform. Pressure to find the perfect gift for everyone, to make it magical, to make it look like something out of a movie—even when you’re scraping the last of your energy off the bottom of the barrel just to stay upright.

The forced smiles don’t lift me up. The rush to supply everyone with what they need or want the most doesn’t boost me—it drains me.

And I know I’m not the only one.


This Time of Year Isn’t Easy for Everyone

There’s a reason so many people are in the dumps this time of year. The dark days don’t just hit the sky—they hit the mind, the heart, the body. Old griefs come up when the world quiets down. Empty chairs at the table hit harder. Regrets get louder when the calendar’s winding down.

And all of that? It gets papered over with tinsel and catchy slogans about joy.

Let me say this plainly: you don’t owe anyone joy you don’t feel.

You’re allowed to have a quieter December. You’re allowed to protect your peace. You’re allowed to say this year, I’m not faking it.



Here’s What I’m Doing Instead

This year, I’m not forcing anything.

I’m gathering with people who make it easy to gather. Who don’t make me perform or fake a mood to keep the energy up. The ones who laugh without checking if you earned it. The ones you can sit in silence with. If I’m lucky enough to be around them, that’s enough.

And yeah, maybe don’t abandon Grandma to the nursing home because you’re burned out—but also, maybe don’t let the coworker who gossips about you all year get a rent-free spot in your mind just because it’s “the season.”

You don’t need to buy a hundred gifts to prove anything. You don’t need to stretch yourself thin to make it feel like December. If anything, give more time this year. Give your presence, not just presents. (Yeah, I know that’s a cliché—but it’s also true.)

Worry less about appearances. Worry more about how you feel when the room clears out and it’s just you again. That’s who you’re really spending the holidays with.



Let December Be What It Is—Not What It’s Marketed As

December doesn’t need to be dazzling. It can just be real. It can be slow. It can be quiet. It can be a breath between chaos and whatever next year’s going to bring.

You don’t have to fake joy to deserve peace.
And you don’t need to be merry to make it through the dark.

MicG