Author: lifeafterdoorkicking

  • Life After Door Kicking: Why I Had to Start Writing or Explode

    What’s the story behind your nickname? “LifeAfterDoorkicking” came about while I was racking my brain for a name that captured the mess, meaning, and momentum of everything I wanted to say. I had this piece—this raw, unfinished, rewritten dozen-times-over piece—sitting in my phone notes, itching to break out of the screen and into the world.…

  • Burned out not broken.

    ,

    It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything here.The truth is, I’ve been in the middle of rebuilding—not just my body, but my routines, my mindset, and my connection to the people who matter most to me. After my accident, recovery took priority. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally too. I had to figure…

  • That day…

    ,

    That day was fucked.I’m not even sure who I’m supposed to be mad at anymore — some pissed-off local, the Taliban, or maybe the Russians who might’ve dumped it all 20 years before. At this point, who knows? And honestly, it probably doesn’t matter. We just left the country again, barely any better off than…

  • Poem in the am

    ,

    If I died today who would mourn If I side hopped would it storm If my heart stopped peace be born Though at first it may look like pain After the worst you will see gain Know our course would see us change Loves a sport but we’re in flames When the resort is to…

  • Illusions

    We had the best of times I keep that in mind When I look for the signs A mirage I can find It never fails to shine Even in the deepest mine Or this prison of my mind Through this prism I’m blind Hard to go on without what I’m

  • Everything is falling apart

    ,

    The most solid thing I had in this world is gone. With it everything else is shaking beneath my feet as well. The thing I had turned all my focus on, that I had dedicated all my attention to is now crumbling before my eyes. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know who…

  • 32 year old?

    ,

    16 year old miscreant. 17 year old rifleman. 18 year old assistant gunner. 19 year old combat veteran. 20 year old sham artist. 21 year old combat leader. 22 year old lifer. 23 year old victim. 24 year old rehabilatator. 25 year old broke dick. 26 year old full time Dad. 27 year old expatriate.…

  • Weening

    ,

    I have what you could call an addictive personality. Whatever it is I can take it to excess. Gaming, gambling, smoking, drinking, sex; if it’s an indulgence I can over do it. Not sure if it’s a nature or nurture thing, but it’s my battle. Balancing indulgence without developing dependence. I have a beast that…

  • This Echo Chamber

    ,

    It’s coming up on a year since my accident. A few years now that I have been having issues with driving. So basically I spend a lot more time at home and alone than I used to. Part of the way I pass time is YouTube. It’s been quite a few years since I stopped…

  • Light on the work tight in the shield.

    I think I’ve done it. I may have retreated so far within myself I’ve turned inside out and am unravelling. Plateaued has probably been my status these last few months. I’ve been noncommittally excercising. Trying to rebuild my muscles waiting for muscle memory to reinforce the motion my nerves are fighting against. I’ll say it’s…